(270) My big little girl

We decided recently that the time had come for Owyn to say goodbye to her beloved binky.

Not only had she become super addicted to it--she couldn't sleep without it--but it was gross and old and was falling apart.

So, on Monday, I showed it to her and told her it was getting old and tired and that it was time to say goodbye to the binky. I was pleasantly surprised when she agreed with me!

We made a plan that she would come grocery shopping with me today and that she would throw her binky into the first garbage can we saw. Then, we would buy her a new toy to help her sleep at night and reward her for being so strong.

All week, I reminded her that on Saturday she would be coming to the store with me and throwing her binky away. She would remind me that it was old and had holes in it, but it wasn't time to throw it away yet. And that she was going to get a new toy.

This morning, she was excited to go to the store and hurried to eat her breakfast so we could go. She made sure I had her binky as we left and then talked to me for most of the drive about all the things around her that would help her throw her binky away (like the clouds and the trees).

About 5 minutes before we got to the store, I handed her the binky and told her it was time to say goodbye. She got very quiet and didn't say another word until we got there. I looked at her and she was sitting with the binky in her lap looking very solemn. I asked her if she was ok and she nodded. "I'm just a little sad, Mommy."

I told her that it was ok to be sad, but that she would be alright.

We found our garbage can, and I was prepared for a bit of a ceremony...maybe some procrastination. But, she marched right up to that garbage and chucked her binky in without a word. No tears.

We picked out her toys (she got 2), did our grocery shopping, and she was happy as could be the whole time.

Then, when we got home, it was naptime. Once again, I was prepared for tears and begging for the binky, but she asked for it once. "I want my binky, Mommy."

I asked if she remembered where her binky was and she smiled and showed me her new stuffed cow. Then she cuddled up to her daddy and, after a restless 20 minutes, finally fell asleep.

Bedtime was a little rougher. Mike was at school studying and I had to work. I started bedtime early so she would get some extra cuddle time, but she was still wide awake when it was time to lay her down.

She didn't ask for her binky, but she is a very emotional little being (like me) and as she grew more tired she had a harder time dealing with things that a 2-year-old finds stressful.

Her blankets didn't cover her feet quite right. She couldn't find her baby. She bumped her finger on the wall. She was thirsty. She didn't know where her imaginary friend had gone. Once she found him, she needed to lay him down and tuck him in. Stuff like that.

Finally, after a couple of hours, I laid her once again back into her bed and wiped her tears. She looked up at me and I asked her if she was having a hard time falling asleep. She nodded. I told her that sometimes when I have a hard time falling asleep, it helps to sing a quiet song to calm myself down.

I was trying to tell her that it would be ok for her to sing quietly to herself, but she looked at me and said, "Will you, Mommy?"

So, as I sang "I Am A Child of God" she gave me a hug and kiss, settled herself in, and I saw her finally relax and start drifting off to sleep. The last thing I heard from her tonight was, "I love you too, Mommy."

I'm so proud of her. She is being so brave. She is such a sweet and tender, yet strong little soul. I love her so.